Nameless Junkie

So I'm walking around the bookstore, wired on a huge caffeinated something, talking to Nameless and it hits me. No, not the 3000 mg of caffeine this one drink has but WHY Nameless is necessary...because that's what he is...necessary. One word kept coming to mind while we talked...well two, but nekkid isn't why he's necessary--appreciated, yes, necessary, no. That word was 'intensity'. His lust for life, relish for action, thirst for knowledge...all of that stuff that makes him the incredible man he is comes through at such intensity that no one who is around him can stay unaffected. And strong empath that I am, it fills me with such force, it can make me dizzy and weak or daring and powerful...or a extremely wicked bitch, depends on the day.

Now, I know he's reading this and going 'we weren't having an intense conversation' and no, we weren't. We were just talking about our days, just chit-chatting; I was looking for yet another diet book and he was helping (600 miles away on his computer) when he brought to my attention that I was talking a hundred miles a minute, thoughts zooming like zephyrs (how'd you like my alliteration there?) and I had to grin to myself, because that's the effect he has on me. Yes...I know, the coffee didn't exactly slow me down, but I know the difference between caffeine zing and Nameless zing.

Moving around so much when I was younger, I never really got the opportunity to latch on to anyone or anything long enough to give a shit. I perfected ambivalence at an early age. I wasn't laid back or 'cool with it' or easy-going...I just flat out couldn't be bothered to care.

...and then Nameless became himself and waged war on my nonchalance.

Now, Nameless is anything BUT laid back. He may say he is and he can protest to High Heaven that's he's just chillin' and casual and relaxed...he fibs. He is one of the most INTENSE people I know...about EVERYTHING and its like crack to me-- my own personal brand of heroin, to quote Edward.

I know he's reading this and thinking to himself 'I don't know what to say about that' (drives me nuts by the way) but its the truth. It's like being in stasis all your life and then BOOM! Firing on all 8 cylinders, world shaking, lightening bolts...I'm mixing my metaphors like crazy, but the point is coming across, I'm sure.
So, the point of this little diatribe, my darling Nameless, is this...for every suck ass day like yesterday (my apologies for my insanity again), I had a snorkel day. Even if I had a month of suck ass days for ever snorkel day, it would be worth it.

You are my wish...

You are the hour I first believed...

Coz I'm a junkie and you're my fix.

Late night randoms...

I took a nap, therefore I am awake...sigh...

1) Funny how my bedroom get so messy...it's only me. The elves (meaning Sara) fear for their lives and won't set foot in there. Cowards...

2) Sweet tea and BLTs (sans L and T) are as awesome at midnight as they are in the morning.

3) I saw a movie once that said and I quote "if you walk on a beach and have a steady hand with the polish, you'll never need a pedicure"...have to call B.S. on that one. I walk on the beach and my feet feel like sandpaper or brillo pads or other scratchy stuff I can't think of right now because its late...and my polish looks like crap...damn beach.

4) I love reading comments on things I write, especially when its from my near and dear. If I could bottle that ego-stroking, the world would never need Xanax. So for those of you who comment (either here or on my facebook or on the phone--Nameless, of course), I thank you from the bottom of my heart. For those who don't...you too shall be lured to the dark side...moo ahahahahahahahah (that's an evil laugh, but I don't know how to write it)

5) At the bottom of these blog drafts, there is a place to add labels to my posts...I guess that's easy when you stick to a theme, but I don't think I have a theme. And NO, Nameless, "rant" is not a theme (shaking my head at Nameless). On this one, I guess I can tag 'beach' 'pedicure' 'Xanax' 'draft'...hee hee...when people type in one of those words in a search engine, can you imagine their faces when they wind up with THIS? Now THAT'S a hardee har har if there ever was one.

6) Best friends from your youth are the best ones to have in your life, even if its in a very peripheral way. They remember you as you were, young, idealistic, motivated, etc. They were there when the castles in the sand were being built over late night ice cream and amaretto sours (it was Texas, we were legal...hush) and for them, it was all going to come true for you. That's one of the things I love about Facebook. I know there are people out there who go on and on ad nauseum about Facebook being the Devil and full of drama and B.S., but those people aren't using it like I do, or like most of the people I know do. I use it to stay in touch with family and friends I never see and find out how their lives are; I use it to connect to family I've never had an opportunity to know in person. And I use it to stalk old boyfriends from high school...I'm not COMPLETELY dull LOL

7) I've rethought the whole black string bikini thing and went out and bought a tankini instead. Even though I know I probably won't see those people again, I just feel weird about waddling down to the water from my blanket with all of THIS exposed. Besides, I have to think of the children...

8) Just talked myself out of another BLT...I feel quite virtuous in my self-denial. Show of hands if anyone thinks it will last.

9) Setting my goal when I start writing for a list of at least 10 items to make it worthwhile for myself and my readers seemed like a good idea at the time, but I didn't take into account that I would be doing this because I couldn't sleep since I took a really long afternoon nap that lasted 'til almost midnight and might not be as creative (and long-winded) as I am naturally inclined to be. This is a space-filler, much like the words 'very' and 'simply' when writing schools papers that require 1000 words or more, remember those?

10) Plan of action tomorrow...go to the beach and work on the tan, do laundry, clean my room (damn elves), pine for Nameless, maybe make cookies and start my diet..again...after all, it will be Sunday.

Happy Easter, folks!

Ten Guilty Pleasures

I'm sitting here trying to think of a topic to blog about that will make everyone laugh and say 'yep, you're right" rather than "Poor Sharon" or "Sharon, Sharon, pity party of one". It's harder now than it was when I worked at Apple Machine or lived the day to day life of a Jerry Springer hopeful. Although I thank God and everything for that no longer being the case, I am sitting here thinking my well of bullshit has been drained dry...I KNOW! Say it ain't so! But there you are...I can't talk about someone who shall remain nameless (although I don't know why he needs to remain nameless but it was an issue so nameless he shall be--a blog for another time, I'm thinking) or the fact that I really DO NOT adore north Florida in any shape or form or how badly I miss my life (another blog writing itself, trust me) or about the HORRIFIC dates I've been on that ended with me telling folks either to their face or via text (less mess) "you're not NAMELESS"...oooo weee, talk about a tangent!

So....Ten Guilty Pleasures

1) Taking a shower and then crawling back into bed when it's cold...I know that just sounds weird, but its so cuddly and yes, I'm not always fully dry and my hair never is, but its the most awesome thing.
2) Disco music--Bee Gees, Rod Stewart, Rick Dees...music that will make you get up and shake your booty--after checking that no one you know is around to actually hear you playing said music.
3) Playing computer card games and pretending its life and death and real money -- I'm a big nerd and it keeps my brain busy.
4) Ordering a venti Java Mocha Chip Frappucino with an extra shot from Starbucks...nummy!
5) Sloppy Joes--I can't have them in the house, I'll eat them all.
6) Buffy the Vampire Slayer
7) Margaritas with extra salt AND tequila...
8) Going in a card store like Hallmark and just spending hours reading cards
9) Trying on shoes even though I know I'm not going to buy them.
10) Spending an entire weekend watching reality TV like "Dual Survival" or "Deadliest Catch", eating summer sausage, cheese & cracker, wearing nothing but a T-shirt and a scrunchie. Good times!
There are other things like pedicures and Good & Plenty candies and using big words to people who are not going to understand them, but my list hits the highlights.